An Unconventional Mother

My Nonagenarian Mother

At the birth of my first daughter, mum was beside me at the hospital and the moment Grace was born she exclaimed “It’s a girl !”.

Mum confessed that it pierced her heart a little for it would mean Grace would have to go through the same pangs during childbirth. It evoked a nostalgic sentiment to realise the truth behind the statement. But what about the joy of motherhood? Surely it is also a privilege that men do not have.

Mum is a strong and determined lady always acknowledging the fact that all her daughters need to go to school and learn the basics of education for an easier life in their adulthood. Mum firmly concedes that without education girls will not get commendable life partners. How does a girl get the affirmation and respect from her in laws if she does not do well in school? Mum really sounds old but it is a good lesson for I am also of one accord with her.  We qualify our girls for the best to happen within our capacity and let the rest in God’s hands.

Mum though originated from China, is modern in thoughts and actions. She is convinced that daughters be given the same status and treatment as her sons both in education and properties. She walks the talk as all she believes in are seen by her offspring today. She seems fair to all. So there goes the unequal treatment of sons and daughters in Chinese homes. This is indeed a commendable practice in the midst of unfounded conventions. Today her girls are doing just as well as her boys. Thanks to mum and her insistence that all her children should be equally treated.

Like a tiger, mum protects her cubs with security and love. Among her offspring there are a couple who truly sent her up and down the doldrums. Mum would hop on to a trishaw and even in the middle of the night go round looking for them when they were not back home on time. Correct a child from stubborn traits or you may end up having to correct the same mistakes over and over again. They say old habits die hard; maybe they do not even die. Believe me, Mother is still doing the correction till this day. Her children remain at the stage she always remembers them; in her eyes they never grow up and her protective instincts continue till this day.

Mum, the typical Teo Chew gracious lady is also one who is house proud. For this there is no compromise. Her house till this day stands spick and span and she always reminds her daughters to make their own beds after a sleep. Seldom can you find her kitchen not in order and her kitchen towels are fit to wash one’s face. She will stack all her towels in good order for easy use. This really puts us to shame.

Her clean habits we had to emulate as little kids. We were not allowed to go to bed without first being in our pajamas and our feet washed. Night after night we would gather at the bathroom to have our bodies washed and powdered. The 6 of us would then go to bed neat and clean. Well, I do practise this as all my girls are well washed before bed time and powdered too. I wonder if my daughters will pass down this tradition. It is a practice worth keeping.

This is a photo of 4 generations. 

That is my mother with my daughter, Grace  and her great, great granddaughter, Emily. 

Well, there are many more worth mentioning practices of my mum but again I need to recall.

 My mother may be dogmatic in her ways but her values are sincere and genuine.

Next better read again.

Mdm Chong

Hard Work Always Pays Off

             

       

               

                  It was three months before the exam I realized I was running out of time. The exams were nearing and I could feel the stress building up in me. As usual, I would always catch up with the homework I had which was a lot. I remember I would always come home from all the extra classes and tuitions I went for feeling exhausted. It all starts from Monday. I would have my Bahasa Malaysia tuition from 3pm to 6pm and then on Tuesdays I would have extra classes for the main subjects from 2pm to 4pm. On Thursdays I would have my maths and science tuition from 5pm to 8pm. The only days I would be free were Wednesdays and Fridays. But free days didn't mean fun days. When I was free, I would find myself either completing my homework or doing revision. It was tiring but I knew that in order to get something good, I have to sacrifice something better. And that was my time and energy.

                   Sometimes I would be very stressed out and would think of giving up. But throughout this whole process and until now, I live by one very important motto my class teacher in my previous school thought me. Eat well, sleep well, study hard and pray. She said praying is the only power that can help calm you down. I went by that motto and every now and then, I would pray, just to clear my mind and calm myself down because I know, God has got my back. God will help me through my hard times and always guide me to the right path.

                     Eventually the exams came. Everyone was anxious and nervous. We all did and definitely tried our best.The support my family and friends gave me was heart-warming and kind. At that point I knew, no matter what I get, I did my best and worked hard. Of course, after the exam ended we all partied like there was no tomorrow and we were so happy because we got through the exam. But we were a little nervous for our results which was just a month away. On results day everyone was nervous. We actually couldn't wait to get our results as this would mean UPSR is officially over. Soon, they started calling out the names of the students who got straight As (5 As) and I felt the tension in me rising. Alphabet by alphabet and then it came to S. It was scary. Suddenly, I heard my name being called. Happiness was overloaded and I couldn't contain my excitement. You probably would know how I would feel. It was like winning a challenge I thought I could never win.

                      Reporters from the media came to interview the students in my school. I saw my mom walking into the school hallway and ran to her and hugged her tightly. I could see her smiling from ear to ear. At that moment, I knew I made my family proud of me. The school year had come to an end and graduation was on its way. It was sad to leave my old friends and my school because memories were made there with them. It was especially sad to leave my class teacher and my Bahasa Malaysia teacher as they were both my favourite teachers. I hope I can meet them soon.


Hope you enjoyed this post, till we meet again in my next post :)

Serena Suresh
Year 7 Gentlesness

To The Rescue

The Law

It was 7.30 am. The lawyer in the house shouted across to us and said she was ready for court. Today was validity day; guilty or not guilty.

Sara invited me to go to court with her. She said it would be a good experience to witness court proceedings. I will get to see real life dramas. In the ride to the court she was worried if dad's migrant worker would be released, There could be unforeseen hitches and if true it would also mean he may not be released even after the 14 day remand. No bail allowed for an offence of this nature.

He was nabbed for illegal entry into the country; condemned because he did not have his papers with him while on an evening chore. He thought his work identification card was sufficient to tell authorities of his legal status. So a charge in court was made against him and the process of getting him released was not a simple one.

At the courthouse I noticed people of all races mostly fathers and mothers gathering in the magistrate
room waiting for their cases to be called. I wondered what kind of crimes had been committed. I had flash backs of such situations in school when we charge our wards of ill discipline, theft, truancy and the all. It was exactly the same feelings; except this time I was not the prosecutor but the defendant so to say. Later Sara told me that many were drug addiction crimes.

Sara was determined to get the worker out by hook or crook. She spoke to the interpreter who without prejudice reiterated that he was not sure the case could be settled. That got Sara unsettled and she contacted criminal lawyers on best solutions. Being the conscientious one, she would not take chances and had earlier on contacted Tenaganita, an NGO. This pro bono organization had sent representatives to visit the accused and also to make sure he was safe, It was not easy to get official permits for jail visits and only official bodies could get access. Dad was concerned about his welfare and whether he understood that help was on the way and that he should stay strong till then.

On a morning such as this and when you realised that not everyone could do anything unless trained as a lawyer, I am proud to be associated with an institution called school. In schools, we nurtured, taught and guided children and prepare them for the real world. Today, when I think of all that has been done to prepare a child for a vocation, I see with my own eyes how Sara carried out her duties. She was confident and vocal, asking questions to clear her doubts. She spoke to the interpreter, the chief police officer and finally the deputy public prosecutor for answers. I looked at her with much pride. The other criminal lawyer representing many clients knew about the case and was amused to find out that the daughter was standing for the father's case and quickly commented that "it is good to have a lawyer in the home; it helps ". 

After being in remand for a fortnight, the DPP finally confirmed that the legal papers have been submitted to the immigration authorities and she was happy to announce that the worker was indeed granted legal entry into the country and acquitted.That was a real relief indeed and dad broke into a smile. He would be able to collect the worker and send him back on site again. I was eager to see him and give him encouragement. As he was handcuffed to the stand I caught a sight of him. He was shaved and seemed to have aged. We tried to get his attention and reassure him that we were there to see him through.

Tenaganita also sent two lawyers to help and a worker with the organization said that they were very eager to see justice done and wanted to follow the case thoroughly. They were happy that we stood for the truth and were willing to go through difficulties for justice. The release letter from the magistrate took quite a while but the wait was worth the while. By noon, dad finally got  his worker out of the court's jail and finally headed back to site.

It was a learning process for me. I was happy and relieved that I received the assurance from Psalm 121  and knew God was working hardest for us. Sara had occasionally called out " Pray, mum".
Yes, we prayed for God's favour and He was merciful. Thank you dear God.

Happily I gave a lunch treat to Sara at her favourite chicken rice stall in SS3. I further made her day by offering to pay her tailor for a dress sewn. It was a pleasure to give her the treat. She had been a good girl and we are awfully proud of her.

All's well that ends well.

We hope to have a deep sleep tonight.

Sara is daughter to Mdm Chong. I hope you boys and girls will learn to stand up for a good cause too in your future careers.

Mdm Chong

My Hometown

     




         
           

                  When it comes to the holidays, my mother and I always plan to go back to our hometown. It is one of the places where we can relax and have a short break from our busy schedules. My hometown is located in Tapah, Perak. We always go back to my Great-aunt's house. To me, it is a fun place as I enjoy my time there very much. On Saturday, my uncle (great-aunt's son) decided that we go back to our hometown together. Although I was ill, I still felt happy and was eager to go.

               My great-aunt's house had a very slow wifi connection. I didn't take that as a problem as I decided to turn off my mobile phone. I'm not gonna lie, I did use my mobile phone, but I made sure I used it wisely. I wanted to spend as much time as i could with my great-aunt as she had a list of stories to tell our whole family. Surprisingly, my fever, cough and flu got much better when I was there.

               We saw many durian stalls as it is the season now. We all are big fans of durian and decided to buy some. We ate it in the stalls just like how my mother used to when she was younger. My great-aunt brought some durians home as she decided to make her ever so famous "Bubur Durian". Her "Bubur Durian" is one of my favourite desserts. My uncle cooked that day too and he tried his attempt on chicken curry. Lunch that day was delightful.

                The rest of the days were spent with cooking, more conversations and relaxation. Our trip ended today and I was sad to leave. I certainly cannot wait for my next trip to my hometown again as this would mean fun and another round of relaxation with my loved ones.


 Hope you enjoyed this post, till we meet again in my next post :)


Serena Suresh
Year 7 Gentleness

                   

                  

Down Memory Lane

Surely it is true that a picture speaks a thousand words.

In Muar today, I could not help but trudge to the backyard that I was so familiar with in my growing years. The flower pot stand where some pots are still placed is the only sight that I could associate with my mum's green fingers and her love for flowers.

But the bougainvillea trees were definitely planted by my mother and how tall and unruly they have grown. When I showed mum the shot she immediately reiterated that the new owners do not love the garden. Mum had resided there for a good few decades and had taken much pride in her then well kept garden. So, she spoke with much pain and regret at the present status.

The backyard was the neighbourhood where my siblings and I used as our daily playground. We played hop scotch, shuttle cock games, hide and seek and everything under the sun. Mum and dad were mostly concerned about making meager earnings to make ends meet. They know no English.

Who would teach us to speak English?

The teachers in our schools of course. Who says children cannot learn under normal teaching and tuition is needed? We had no money for those extras. It was either you learn from one another or you are out. Thank you teachers.

Who taught us Mandarin?

The POL classes in school. Thank you teachers.

Who taught us the little Bahasa Melayu we knew then?

The teachers in school of course. Thank you teachers.

Having being brought around a rich neighbourhood of varied language users, we spoke Teo chew, Hokkien, Hakka and thrive successfully as linguists.

Thanks to hardship and street wisdom that we survived.

Circumstances do shape the quality and values we are brought up. Not having the best under the sun does not equate with right living. We need to listen to parents and their principles and follow when appropriate. Seldom do parents not want to impart right values.

It was at this very spot when it was clean and neat then that I had memories of girl friends and boy friends. My girl friends would pop over for my mum's tasteful dishes for lunches after school. My mother knew most of my friends then and some still visit her till this day.

It was also here that boy friends came to court my siblings and I ! We would spend hours chatting and exchange high opinions ! Hahaha so very often we would gather together for supper and even durian eating. Oh , today I went all nostalgic recalling those times but it was surely a place of many events and turmoil too. My father who was very stoic then could even slam the door driving all the boys away ! Who said you can allow boys to come ? Mum was more understanding; she was afraid we were not able to be married off so she was more tolerant and allowed courtships! She has sharp eyes and opined quite accurately about them; so the boys were smart. They befriended her first and when she was on their side, my father followed suit. This principle of courtship surely is still relevant today. Try it, boys.

Many more to be recalled. It would take a while but I need to pause now to allow the best memoirs to be recounted. So that's it for now.

The backyard siblings.

Madam Chong